As my hope is slowly tearing apart, I want to say goodbye to you. Goodbye and today maybe the last day you’ll ever see me again. I am going to miss you but I know I can get over it. Actually, I am really mad at you. Mad because, yo never told me what you really feel. You never showed me that I was mandatory to you and that, you love me. You never loved me back. I loved you soo much that it hurts. And that IS STUPID! I want to tell you what I really feel but, I was a coward. I don’t want to lose you and because of that, you’re gone and i know I’ll never have that chance to express what i really feel. To you, I want you to be happy with whatever you are doing. I want you to be happy with your girlfriend and I want you to someday realize that you lost me. I want you to regret someday and realize what a dumbass you are but that’s just my wishful thinking. I am going to start forgetting you. I am going to do that and when we see eachother again, I’ll make sure you’ll regret everything.
January 17, 2013:
The day after my birthday. Today’s weather forecast is.. It is a windy day. I was a bit early when I was on my way to school. Luckily I caught a jeep right about when I arrived on the main high-way. As I step in the jeepney, I fill myself with positiveness. Today is going to be a tiring day, I thought so. As the ride went on, I felt shivers through my skin. The wind blew so hard that it gives me goosebumps. As I wander my eyes, I noticed those busy people across the streets. Eager to arrive on their respective offices and those students who are already running late on their classes. I wonder what could they be thinking. I’m sure most of them are already losing hope for it’s a rush hour. Almost all Jeepneys are full and it is almost impossible to ride one. Then the sudden pause of the jeepney woke me up from my reverie. I then noticed that I’m almost reaching my destination. I payed the jeepney fair before I reach my school. As the jeepney crosses the 1st Bridge, I marvel my eyes to the calm ocean. It is peaceful and I didn’t noticed any vessel around. Then a sudden memory rushed into my mind that it struck me into horror. I remembered that first scene in the movie “The Final Destination 5” where the bridge starts to fall apart, causing death to the main characters. I then shove off that memory. I don’t want that to be realized for goodness sake!
As I stepped out of the jeepney, I then rushed to my respective classroom for I know that any minute by now, our class will already start. I then ran hurriedly inside the campus pass the gate then I climbed the fucking high stairs! It consumed my energy and my legs went Jell-O! My’GOOOSSSH! It was really tiring!. When I arrived, our professor wasn’t there yet and so, I decided to talk to my classmates. I laughed with them and had fun. After a few minutes, our class started. Our class, I must say, It IS really BORING! I felt sleepy in the middle of the discussion. I tried my best to wake myself up. By 9am, the classis over (THANK GOODNESS!).
Me, Sammy and Chenee then went upstairs to grab some snacks. We talked and ofcourse, we were bitching over bitches! At the canteen, we saw some guys who really are attractive and feast them with our appreciative eyes. Oh’well, i enjoyed talking to them. They really are fun to be with. They always make me smile and laugh till’ I drop! They are one of my closest friends in UC-LM. And so, after staying in the canteen for awhile, We then went to 7-11 to have a Fundae Cone. I choose Vanilla flavor. I love how the Vanilla flavor taste in my mouth. It is really delicious.
After that, we went to the campus ministry. It is where I’m always staying along with my friends. As we arrived, Jenny is there. Then, Ralph arrived. We then talked. We laughed and laughed all over again. Ralph is really funny. He is a good person and yet, he insults a lot. He is fun to be with. I wonder what would happen in the future if we become really close. I remember when Sammy introduced me to Ralph. He then whisper to Sam that I’m attractive. (CHAAAARR! HAHAHAHA)
Students are getting ready to go to The Basilica (Basilica Del Sto. Nino). We’re having a half day for UC well be participating in the mass at The Basilica. We then head off to have a lunch outside the cmapus with Sam, Choi, Me, Chenee, and Ate Marg. I ate a lot this lunch. I really am famished!
As the afternoon went on, I just sat there in the bench listening to music. It was boring and so I decided to go home and have a rest. I don’t want to stay there anymore. It is too quite!
This day was quite lame. I hate how this day went on. It was really unproductive and I didn’t seized this day. Tomorrow is Friday. I hope it’s going to be a fine day. I want tomorrow to be fun and spontaneous. GTG. My laptop’s battery is almost draining. I must charge it now or else mother will become hysterical!
Ydanne X — 01/17/13